Never doubt that I am thrilled to be getting a divorce. I’m so happy without the asshole in my life that it’s amazing to me some days. There is a part of me that thinks that I should be mourning the death of my marriage, but I’m just thrilled that that part of my life is over.
I’m not looking for love, I’m not looking for a relationship, I don’t believe that I’ll ever find that kind of love that the storytellers tell us about.
Honestly, I’m totally alright with that.
I don’t need a man to save me, I don’t want a man to save me. I certainly don’t need someone to complete me. I’m pretty darn complete by myself. I have friends that I can share with and have experiences with. I don’t need a man to make my life more interesting or more memorable.
I don’t even need a man in my bed. But I sure like one there! 🙂
While all of this may be true for my life, it still hurts me to hear that a friend of mine is going through a divorce. I may not need these things, but I wish them for my friends. Because I want them to be happy.
I just found out, yesterday, that a friend of mine is going through a divorce. It happened at the beginning of the year and they have children and it’s very stressful on him. And I feel badly for him, although I know he’ll be happier when it’s over.
Because, even though I don’t think I’ll ever find that fairy tale love, I believe in it. I just don’t believe it’s for me. I want my friends to find it, or hold onto it, whatever the case may be.
I think my biggest issue with my friends’ divorce(s) is that I remember what it felt like when he told me he wanted a divorce. It was like a punch to the gut, followed by extreme panic when I tried to figure out what I was going to do.
Everything fell into place, but that first couple of months (where my friend is now) were so hard and stressful.
I guess, bottom line, I just want my friends to be happy. I feel badly for them when they go through something wrenching like this and wish I could help. But, I find that I’m not really a help.
Cause I’m so damn happy in my life. Cause I’m so damn happy about my divorce.
Cause I’m just so damn happy.
I want, for all of my friends, for them to be happy in their lives. Sometimes that takes a wrenching change, like divorce, and sometimes it comes with true love.
I guess I just feel badly for him because I know how hard it is those first few months. He’ll catch up to my happiness, eventually.
Until then, I guess I’ll just be there for him and help him as much as I can.
Because that’s all you can do, right? Be a shoulder, be an ear, be a friend.
I’m alright with that.